braindribbles

Posts Tagged ‘fun

Hi folks.

These last couple of weeks I’ve been doing something I don’t seem to have been managing much recently. It’s the Easter holidays, and I’ve been enjoying spending time with the children.

And I mean properly enjoying them.

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If you see what I mean.

Now, I love those kids, and I, even recently, regularly have little moments of heart-glow several times a day, especially as smallest one has been doing so many new cute things recently. In spite of my numerous low moments recently. But what I haven’t been doing is engaging with them on any level other than making sure they go to school clothed and fed and making sure they go to bed fed and teeth brushed. I haven’t had any room to enjoy them. Not emotionally.

Instead, I have been shutting myself off. Unable to handle any more than the bare minimum, I have been using the iPad loved one gave me last year. I have hidden myself away and frittered huge quantities of time finding an unsatisfying numbness in pointless games. Games that don’t need anything from me but my eyes, fingers and reactions.

But now we are on holiday. In a cottage in North Wales. Lovely. Rainy. Lots of green with lots of sheep. Waking up to the sound of bleating. Simply fabulous. And most importantly of all, all five of us are here. For two weeks.

Two weeks! I may have mentioned this last post, it’s such a rare event. And I have been given a chance to stop worrying about the daily grind, thanks to a lot of input from loved one. We have slept lots, been out in the fresh air lots (and in the rain a lot too, of course). And, whilst my now-rather-difficult-to-break habit of retreating into my games has some way to go, at least I have felt alive. And more to the point, able to cope.

And the kids have been WONDERFUL. Extra cuddles from the lot of them. Extra jokes cracked by oldest one. Extra pictures drawn for me by middle one and heaps of new words and actions from smallest one.

Or maybe it’s not extras. Maybe it’s just their wonderful normal selves, and I am only just noticing.

Gotta try and savour that once the holiday is over…

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Yes, we’ve exchanged contracts on our house sale.  It was in the offing all last week, but nevertheless a considerable weight was lifted from our shoulders when our solicitor rang at 9.05 a.m. last Friday to give us the news.

We have another month before we complete, and you can never be sure of anything these days, but it is still some kind of a milestone and means we have a tiny bit more ammunition for the school admissions officials.

In the meantime, I’m trying to work out what to take with us to the in-laws, what to put into storage till we can move into the new place, and what to sneakily throw away while nobody is looking.

So far my latter pile is far too small.  It doesn’t help that the kids are on school holiday, so I can’t get rid of their junk quite as easily as I’d hoped. The British Heart Foundation are coming to take away a big heap of furniture in a week’s time though.  The trick will be to hack a way through the garage junk to make it possible for them to remove the relevant items.

Maybe once I have access to the dark depths of the  garage I can stealthily donate a few more boxes to charity. I’m messy, but when I de-clutter I’m ruthless.  I’m especially ruthless with other people’s possessions.  Even more so when such items have been gathering dust in the garage for a good five years without being missed.  I say this; loved one has a knack for spotting what’s gone, and very impressive look of outrageous indignation.  I reckon he must have played those visual memory games a lot as a kid.

I had some boxes delivered for packing the items to take to the in-laws. The best ones of all are the wardrobe boxes – particularly fabulous for playing peekaboo with a one-year-old. The cardboard door will swing naturally shut, then suddenly swoosh open with a big ‘beebo’, a huge grin and lots of giggles.

OK, so moving house is stressful, but it’s also fun.

I’m off now to sneak some items into the charity box while loved one’s away. (Shhh, don’t tell.)