The potty saga continues

Posted on: 08/04/2011

Yesterday middle child comes home with marks in her pants followed by unpleasant toilet goings-on.  We ask what happened to cause this, and she claims the head teacher (taking the class that afternoon) wouldn’t let her go.

Suat Eman / FreeDigitalPhotos.netToday, as a result, feeling so frustrated I want to cry, I email the school again (nobody can see tears on email), with a fairly long yet polite lecture about how important it is to let her go.  Again.

They come and find me after school and tell me that every time middle child has asked to go, she has always been allowed to. Moreover, if they see she needs to go before she realises herself, they make a point of shooing her towards the loos.

I believe them.  I take middle child to the car, and before we drive off, I sit in the back with her and talk about it with her.  I ask if perhaps the case is not so much that she isn’t being allowed to go, but more that she’s too scared to ask the teachers.  She nods in a worried manner.

Oh dear.  Teachers, at the best of times, have to control a class of upwards of fifteen children.  Of course they are going to be a little intimidating at times, or else the class would never have any respect for authority.  However, at times like this such an imposing presence can backfire.  Even for the head teacher, who by my reckoning (and I’ve seen her teach) is very gentle with the kids.

So actually, we don’t have a problem with the teachers.  We have a problem with middle child’s perception of the teachers.

How do you deal with something like that?

I think it’s time to go and talk to the school and see if they have any suggestions. I might have done that this afternoon if the subject matter didn’t seem to provoke tears to flow…  I’ll wait till I’m feeling a little less sensitive to the topic. I’ll keep you posted.


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