Please do not swear

Posted on: 17/02/2011

Arvind Balaraman /

My seven-year-old kind of swore today.

I say kind of. He said something like, ‘We had a hell of a time’.

I know, it could have been a lot worse.  Yet, somehow, even though it’s acceptable in adults, children’s swearing of any sort is rather repulsive.  So he was suitably admonished.  And it got me thinking.

To be frank, I’m not that keen on ANYONE swearing in our house.  Much Beloved will occasionally use the F-word when stubbing his toe, or recalling something important he’s forgotten.  And because there’s hardly any swearing, when such words are used, they stand out so much more.  I can get quite annoyed about this.  It seems to spoil the tone somehow.

Not that I can really point the finger.  OK, so everyone who knows me even vaguely will probably think that I never swear.  But I am more than capable of a few choice words when I feel the need.  I remember swearing on one occasion at work, and everyone was so surprised they kept on going on about it all day.

Admittedly I can’t stand the F-word.  Or the S-word.  Or the C-word.  There are a couple of B-words I do like using…one of which is really no better than those that are more forbidden.  It makes no sense that such a word is more acceptable than the others.  Even worse, I use those words in front of the children regularly before realising  – so I really have myself to blame when my son uses one of them.

Oh, and when did ‘Pardon my French’ make it all better?  I’m sure the kids have been rolling their eyes at that one.  I’m rolling my own eyes, and I’m the one who says it on a regular basis.

I just have one more thing to bring to the table of swearing: How come ‘Oh my God’ is so acceptable now?  I find it incredibly disrespectful.   Yet it’s become so commonplace I hear nursery kids saying it to each other in the playground.

Bring back sugar, fudge, gosh, heck and bother, that’s what I say.


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